True Love? On TV, There’s an App for That.

Structurally, at least, it is radical to make the ending point of so many other entertainment - the search for true love - the starting point. But "The One" and "Soulmates", which have been renewed for a second season, don't feel radical. You will feel like you are on a vacation where it rains every day. That's partly because the target of their cynicism is so big and neon-obvious. Big tech may not know what's best for us? A microchip doesn't guarantee happiness at home? You don't say that These shows ignore the idea that there could be many and multiple soul mates. They also mostly ignore the inconsistency of human psychology and how we often don't want what or who we should. I remember my 20s dinner dates with eligible and eligible men - dates that made me wonder how deeply I would have to stab myself with a fork to end them prematurely.

"Made for Love" traffic in the same big-tech disdain. Billy Magnussen's Byron, a Jobsian, believes he has optimized his relationship with his wife, Cristin Miliotis Hazel, by using technology to perfect sleep, exercise, diet, and even their orgasms. On the other hand, the microchip actually helps: only when he loses it and sees the world (literally) through its eyes does he get to know it at all. Still, there's a low-tech workaround for this - Basic Empathy.

A side benefit of all of this technology is that it exposes the television's other attempts to hack, short-circuit, or otherwise interfere with the chaos and annoyance of advertising. In theory, reality shows like "The Bachelor" and "The Bachelorette" select ideal candidates. (In practice, they look below average for racism and secret girlfriends.) Few marriages occur. Last year, “Indian Matchmaking,” a Netflix series that caused brief sensations, seemed to offer a proven methodology. None of his participants are together yet.

If the science in "The One" or "Soulmates" were real and effective, we could all live like medieval principles engaged from birth. Or in a “Made for Love” world, we could use wearable technology to merge with any available lover. Our romantic life would be effortless and smooth. Not a frog. All prince.

However, love is more than just biometrics and compatibility questionnaires. When we date the wrong people, we learn about who we are and what we want and how to act when the right person writes us back. Because it's not that easy to fall in love and stay there. It takes work and time and a certain amount of self-awareness and a consistent practice of compassion. There is no app for that. Still. Maybe that's a good thing.

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